If you’re thinking about becoming a surrogate, understanding the surrogacy process step by step is one of the most useful things you can do before you decide. Not the glossy version — the real one. What happens, in what order, and what does it feel like along the way?
The process starts with an online application. You’ll share basic information — your age, location, health history, pregnancy history, and lifestyle. This gives our team a first look at whether you meet the general requirements for surrogacy.
If things look promising, you’ll connect with Kaci Moore, our Recruitment and Intake Manager. This isn’t a formal interview. Instead, it’s a real conversation — a chance for you to ask questions, share your motivations, and get an honest picture of what the journey involves. Kaci has been through surrogacy herself. She’ll tell you what she actually wishes she’d known.
Nothing is rushed at this stage. The goal is information, not commitment.
The second step in the surrogacy process is also the most thorough. It exists to protect you, the intended parents, and the pregnancy. Here’s what it involves:
Medical records review. First, we gather your records directly from your providers — OB, hospital, and any relevant specialists. An independent nurse practitioner then reviews them. We’re looking at your full pregnancy history, not just what you remember.
Medical clearances. Next, you’ll be evaluated by an OB/GYN and a maternal-fetal medicine specialist (MFM). Both must clear you before you move forward. Additionally, the fertility clinic pre-approves you before matching.
Psychological evaluation. A licensed psychologist who specializes in reproductive medicine conducts your evaluation. This includes proctored standardized testing and clinical sessions. Together, these sessions cover your social history, support system, coping skills, and emotional readiness. It’s thorough — and it’s there to support you, not gatekeep you.
Background check. Finally, this covers you and the adults in your household.
All screening costs are covered. None of this comes out of your pocket.
Once you’re fully screened and approved, we identify intended parents whose preferences, values, and vision are compatible with yours.
You’ll start by reviewing their profile. Then comes the match call — a facilitated conversation between you, the intended parents, and your case manager. Both sides ask questions and get a real sense of each other. If it feels right, the match moves forward.
You are never pressured into a match. If something doesn’t feel right, we find a better fit.
For most surrogates, the match call is one of the most meaningful moments of the entire process. You meet the people whose family you’re going to help build. That becomes very real, very quickly.
After matching, both sides retain independent legal counsel. Your attorney reviews and negotiates the gestational carrier agreement on your behalf — at no cost to you.
The contract covers everything: compensation and payment schedule, medical decision-making, expectations during pregnancy, delivery plans, and post-birth communication. Importantly, nothing proceeds to medical treatment until contracts are signed and both parties are satisfied.
This step typically takes four to six weeks. It’s worth taking the time to do it right.
Once contracts are signed, your body begins preparing for the embryo transfer. This involves a protocol of medications — typically oral pills, patches, and injectable hormones — to prepare your uterine lining.
Throughout this phase, your fertility clinic monitors your progress through blood draws and ultrasounds. When your lining is ready, the transfer takes place. The procedure itself is brief and non-surgical — most surrogates describe it as similar to a pap smear. You’ll rest for a short period afterward before heading home.
About ten days later, a blood test checks for pregnancy. This is one of the most emotionally charged moments of the journey — for you and for the intended parents.
If the first transfer doesn’t result in pregnancy, the cycle repeats after a recovery period. This is not unusual, and it is not a failure.
A confirmed pregnancy is a milestone worth celebrating. As a result, your care transitions to your local OB and the pregnancy proceeds much like any other — prenatal appointments, ultrasounds, the full arc of a normal pregnancy.
Throughout this phase, your case manager stays in close contact. They’re not just checking boxes. Instead, they’re making sure your medical bills are handled, your insurance is working correctly, and travel and childcare reimbursements are in place. If something comes up between appointments, you have someone to call who actually knows your situation.
Monthly compensation begins after pregnancy is confirmed. Your wellness allowance, incidentals, and any additional fees all kick in at the milestones specified in your contract.
The birth is planned well in advance — a birth plan developed with your OB and shared with the intended parents, so everyone knows what to expect. Depending on your preference and the circumstances, the intended parents may be in the room or nearby when the baby arrives.
Most surrogates describe the birth as one of the most emotional moments of their lives — not because it’s hard to hand the baby over, but because of what it means to watch a family begin. That moment stays with surrogates for a long time.
After delivery, your recovery receives the same care as the pregnancy itself. Postpartum medical follow-up is covered. Bedrest support, if needed, is covered too. Meanwhile, your case manager checks in regularly during this period.
Some surrogates stay in close contact with their intended families after birth. Others prefer more distance. Both are valid. Whatever you want the ongoing relationship to look like is worth discussing with your intended parents before the birth — not after.
Finally, your last compensation installments and any remaining reimbursements are paid through the escrow account during the postpartum period.
The full surrogacy journey — from application to delivery — typically takes 18 months to two years. Here’s a rough breakdown:
Some journeys move faster. Some take longer, particularly if more than one transfer cycle is needed. Going in with realistic expectations makes the process feel less uncertain.
Understanding the surrogacy process step by step helps you go in with realistic expectations — and that makes the whole journey smoother. At every stage, your Chesapeake Surrogacy case manager is with you. Not just for the big milestones — for the questions that come up at 9pm, for the moment something feels off, for the days when you just need to talk to someone who gets it. Every member of our team has been a surrogate or an intended parent. That’s not incidental. It shapes everything about how we show up for you.
If you’re ready to learn more — or simply want to ask questions without committing to anything — Kaci is the right person to start with.
Reach out to Kaci Moore, our Recruitment and Intake Manager, at kaci@virginiasurrogates.com — or start your application when you’re ready.
